


Nancy Drew and the Bedtime Intruder

by thegirlnamedcove



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Kid Fic, Kinda, M/M, Short & Sweet, sterekmystery, sterekweek2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-25
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2021-01-13 16:18:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21170792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegirlnamedcove/pseuds/thegirlnamedcove
Summary: Parenting is pretty magical sometimes.Other times it's challenging.Mostly, it's just weird.





	Nancy Drew and the Bedtime Intruder

"Why...the fuck is the roomba in our bed?"

Derek popped his head out from the bathroom door, toothbrush still in his mouth.

"Wheah?"

Stiles gestured with his head, still stuck in the half crouch he'd been in when he noticed the tiny robot and stopped what he was doing, his pajama pants only halfway up his legs.

"It's, ah. Tucked in."

Derek frowned, disappeared to spit. When he re-emerged there was a smear of white paste at the corner of his mouth, accenting the puzzlement written across his features.

Stiles pulled his pants the rest of the way up.

"Did it...I mean, it couldn't have gotten up there on its own," Derek said.

Stiles raised an eyebrow. "What, as in took a flying leap? Yeah, probably not, buddy-ol-pal."

The frown rose up to meet his gaze and deepened into a scowl. Derek swatted at his middle, and Stiles squawked as he flinched away.

"Don't call me buddy. We've been married five years for chrissakes."

"Sorry, snookums. You know I mean cuddle buddies. With extra cuddle. Right in your buddy."

Another swat, this time getting him square in the solarplexus, and knocking some of the breath from his lungs.

"I am divorcing you, and when I do the judge will only need to hear about this conversation to take my side."

"Yeah, yeah," Stiles laughed, "Okay, message received. Really, though. Someone had to put it there and it wasn't me."

Derek turned back to the bed, this time leaning close and pulling the blanket back an inch to inspect it. Stiles had an insane urge to reach out, pull his husband back by the shoulder, as if the Roomba was liable to bite him.

He huffed out a sigh, and dug around under the edge of the pillow, pulling up a lime green pacifier with teal green elephants printed out the outer face.

"Tucked into bed, with a binky, and a little stuffed sheep looks like."

"Drew," Stiles guessed, and Derek nodded. The three year old ball of fire and enthusiasm that currently occupied the second bedroom at the end of the hall. Despite how rough and tumble she could be, she was a surprisingly empathetic kid, even when it came to inanimate objects. Stiles insisted she inherited it from Derek, the big softie, but Derek insisted that adoption doesn't tend to involve heritable traits.

"You know if we move it, she'll be devestated, right?" Stiles asked. Derek just grunted in reply.

After a beat, Stiles added, "Well we're not sleeping with it." Derek grunted again.

After a long minute spent staring at the Roomba, vaguely hoping it might get up and excuse itself, exempting them from having to deal with it, Derek piped up

"What if...we get that little crate from the front room. With the fake fruit inside it? And we put a blanket in there, and we set the roomba up somewhere where it won't bother us."

"Are you suggesting we make it a bed of its own?"

"I just… I mean… Yeah. I am."

Stiles tilted his head. It wasn't the worst idea. Sure, they probably shouldn't indulge Drew's devotion to whatever random object came into her hands. They didn't want her growing attached to the vacuum, especially since it would need replacing in the next year. But sometimes…. sometimes being a parent meant doing dumb shit, in order to negotiate some peace. And really. There were worse things.

"Okay," he sighed, "I'll go downstairs. You gather any more stuff the Roomba can't sleep without."

He was halfway down the hallway before he heard, "What the fuck, are those Cheerios?"

**Author's Note:**

> Does this constitute a mystery? Not really. But I've got a whole theme in mind for the week that's Nancy Drew related so hopefully those good vibes will translate back to give this first installment credibility.


End file.
